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Junior high girls are asking the question, “can I still be popular if I refuse to have porn-star sex?” One mom, in tears, told us her 14-year-old daughter had been asked by several guys in her class for naked pictures of herself (which then get traded between boys during recess). Their preferences mirror what they’ve seen in porn. I’ve had several young women tell me about the vile and violent things boyfriends and husbands, both Christian and non-Christian, have requested or demanded of them. Women and girls often pay the highest price when it comes to this clandestine form of entertainment. After hearing countless stories of how pornography has affected the lives of others, I’ve come to realize that the consequences of porn use are akin to flying bits of shrapnel: painful, unpredictable, and in some ways, fatal to our lives.
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When someone throws a hand grenade, it’s impossible to know where every single piece of shrapnel will fall. I recently made a documentary about pornography, and something a porn director said in his interview caught my attention: “No one has ever died from an overdose of pornography.” These words reflect a belief many of us quietly ascribe to: that our personal porn habits aren’t that harmful. Kids today are one google search away from violent, sexually explicit video content online. How far we’ve come from the days of the dictionary. This article is part of our Quarterlife series, produced in partnership with Unite Health Share Ministries. The clinical dictionary definition left me disappointed, and when my dad asked what word I’d looked up, I lied with a blush on my face and claimed I forgot. Determined to get in on the joke, I borrowed my dad’s dictionary to try to understand it. A few months later, I heard a word on the playground and figured it was sexual because boys were laughing about it. My curiosity to find more was trumped only by my lack of access. When I saw porn for the first time at 11, I was convinced I was the only kid in the world who had stumbled upon it.